Ooookay, so I really dropped the ball you guys, and I'm sorry. I asked you wonderful deviants to join me in making Jak wallpapers, but I missed the deadline myself and haven't put...I think the last three? Entries up yet. Firstly, I'd like to ask those of you who haven't seen your entries in my journal yet to repost them to this journal in the comments. I've lost your original comments by thoughtlessly cleaning my inbox and since you put in the wonderful effort and goodness, people should see the kick-ass shit you've made, I'd like to put them up.

Again, I'm sorry for that wait.

For those of you who don't know (I'm guessing a large chunk because I don't do this communication thing very well) I've started college! I now go to College for Creative Studies in Detroit. It's beeeyond awesome. I love it here.

College is eating my soul.

I have very little time I don't spend staring at a piece of paper or the wall because every class demands homework. I've never had to work so hard in my life. In fact, as I write this, I'm trying to finish up a digital piece for my Digital Fundamentals class. I'm taking a well needed break, finding I want to speak instead of, well, staring at the wall and waiting for my brain to kick back online.

It's kinda like--you know when you leave Photoshop running for too long and you try to do something complicated and the jerk crashes on you? My brain does that now. It's so fun.

BUT UH ANYWAY; yes, that is why I haven't been around or I have been around for, like, two seconds. Please, my DA friends, bare with my loser tendencies. They are abundant.

BUT THE REASON I AM WRITING THIS ENTRY;

I am a bisexual feminist and I'm damn well proud of it. I like debating women's rights and gay rights and religion and oh so many other things. Debate is fun. It means I get to argue shamelessly and get away with it.

Gay rights are honestly more important to me than women's rights. It's because, well, women are still objectified and continue to earn less than their alter egos, but at least you can admit you're a woman and still be allowed to teach, or marry (half of the time), or be allowed at your parents house. I feel human rights for Gays honestly need more attention. Thinking about that tonight--because I tend to let my mind wander when I draw. Usually it's just a lot of cursing, but occasionally I get something productive done up there--I realized something.

I don't think it's fair that we categorize men doing effeminate things as 'gay'. That's a huge misconception. Most gay men aren't guilty of anything more effeminate than liking other men. To lump it all together and then criticize someone for being girly by associating them with a homosexual man is just...well, it's ridiculous.

They aren't acting gay in any way, unless they're thinking of pursuing a relationship with another man. WHICH SHOULD BE FINE, but lets face it, in the American culture, it's wholly Not Fine. Which sucks.

What they're acting is effeminate. If they're acting effeminately in the sense they care strongly about their appearance and like more 'dressy' outfits and hair-styles, then you would say they are 'metrosexual'. If they like to wear women's clothing, put on make-up and/or occasionally put on a nice feet crippling pair of high heels, they are typically called a transvestite. If they like to cook, like dramas or romances, enjoy acting in or watching a good musical, there is NOTHING about this that affects their sexual orientation. They are simply doing what society has dictated as 'feminine' things.

Which, hey, I say is bullshit, but if we must conform to society in some way; call them effeminate.

That is what they're being.

It's homophobic to say any of those actions are 'gay'. That is a homophobic reaction.

I do it. I haaaave homosexual desires. I really, really, reeeeally like the womens, and I do this. I act homophobic. I will admit that, and good-golly-gosh, I am trying to change this. I still show misogynistic knee-jerk reactions. If you don't know what that means, misogyny is 'hatred of women'. What the Eff, I am a woman--how could I hate women? I was raised in a white, middle class Christian home, that's how. It's not even conscious, that's simply my upbringing rearing its head ever so often.

It happens, the trick is thinking past the programing and realizing what you're saying--or thinking--means. I think--I strongly feel lumping effeminate men with homosexual men is homophobic.

It's also sexist. Hypothetically; say a man is caught baking cookies and his friend teases him by accusing him of being gay.

Now replace the word 'gay' in that scenario with, say, 'a girl'. Wouldn't that be sexist? I'd think so.

While a good chunk of the American society is still a-okay with gay jokes (hell, even DISNEY is using them now), sexism is often a no-no. Not always, because I don't believe for a minute that women are treated equally to men, but a good chunk of the time sexism trumps homophobia. If you think about it, the worst insult for anyone, should you ask anyone, would be calling the other person some variation of 'woman', be it a female body-part or something women use, like a 'douche' for example. Still, you can argue sexism a lot easier than you can argue homophobia on the one key principle that most denominations of Christianity no longer outwardly teach women to be second-hand citizens. Gays? Oh sure, they're just wrong.

I guess the summary of this entry would be this; think about what you say and what people around you say. I'd hope you don't use the phrase 'that's so gay' when you mean something is 'wrong' or 'bad' or 'weird', because that is waaaay more homophobic than just referring to effeminate men as 'gay'. That is a knee-jerk for me. It offends me to no end.

But, assuming you already don't say 'that's so gay', consider not saying 'gay' when you mean 'effeminate'. Consider not even bringing it up, because if you mean 'effeminate' as 'bad'? You're being sexist and misogynistic.

It's something you definitely would have to work for, but what would you lose? Consider, for a moment, that doing this will make you a better, more compassionate person. I don't feel it matters to me whether or not saying that will offend any of my friends. It offends me. It doesn't matter what the rest of the world perceives as 'acceptable' in this situation because this, at its core, bothers me. I can only hope that it will bother at least one other person who reads this and they will change how they use the word 'gay', too.

Another epic for my front page. Thank you for getting this far. I hope you have a good day :>